Fight For Preemies

Today is Fight For the Preemies day hosted by March of Dimes. The US is one of the worst countries in relation to number premature infants and the survival rates of these small blessings. I am not going to get into the topic of why there are so many premature births here, for today is just about educating the public on how they can help the families of premature babies.

So, in honor of today, I would just like to link to my NICU post and also to my daughter's birth story. The more you know about the NICU and what these amazing doctors and nurses do to help these special babies, the more you can understand and help the ones you know if they are going through this time.

NICU

Glade's Story

There are also some amazing blogs out there that are writing about today, so check out the blog list I have on the right. A lot of the blogs there will be dealing with this heartfelt and hard topic today.

Birth Story #37

This week's story is one that has been going around the blogsphere like crazy.

The mother was dropped the day before her due date for wanting a VBAC.

Read the story HERE

And some people think OBs are nice and don't pressure women into anything....

What's So Great About Granola?

****Before you start reading, I just want to let you know that I am not writing this post to offend anyone. I am not writing this to say that people made wrong choices or judging anyone in particular. This is just a post about my decisions with two interesting topics, one harder than the other. If you take offense, do not post in the comments, because that is NOT my intent. I am writing about what I have learned and what I have decided for me and my family. Not yours, and not anyone else's. SO if you are offended, get over it, and realize this isn't about you****

A lot of the people I follow on twitter are of a mainly 'crunchy' crowd. Natural childbirth, cloth diapering, not circumcising, unattended childbirthing women. They ask me a lot of hard questions, and they have helped me wonder about a lot of different things most days.

Last night, I posted a tweet that read, "Why is there so little faith in a woman's body? Is it so hard to trust that a woman's body knows how to give birth?"

I didn't get any comments on it for a few hours. When I finally did, it was an anti-circumcision group that responded, "What about the baby boy's body? His penis does not need surgery". I have fought with a lot of the anti-circ women and a lot of the time it just ended in an ugly debate with them calling me selfish and all that stuff. This time I told them I still hadn't decided and I would eventually make the choice that was best for me and my family.

Instead of arguing with me about it, they took what I said! That at first said a lot to me. If they didn't want to argue, that in itself was amazing. I asked them a few questions, and she sent me a link to a new circumcision photoshoot a doula had just done. She has some amazing photographs of birth and cesareans that are extremely powerful considering they are just photographs. I had heard about the circumcison one and couldn't bring myself to look at it. Since the person I was talking to had been so nice, I decided to take a look.

(This is the link.. beware it is truly graphic)

I took a look at the photographs, and the power of them had me in tears. I had seen videos and other photographs of circumcision and none of them had hit me this hard. She has such a way with images and it is absolutely incredible.

After I saw these, I only had one thought in my head, "This will never happen to my children." I hadn't thought about the different ways of it, or the reasons, I just had a gut reaction to it. After this reaction, I talked to an amazing woman (devaskyla, you rock!) and was able to talk through it.

Now, this analogy might not make sense to anyone else, but this is how I view it. (And I know there is a difference between a cesarean and a circumcision, just bare with me).

I saw the pictures of that little boy strapped to a table with tears running down his cheeks, and all I could see is myself. I was strapped to a table while my child was cut out of my body. He was strapped to a table while they cut off a piece of his body. I had no comfort during the surgery except my husband holding my hand. He had no comfort during his surgery except his pacifier.

The only thing I could think is that if I do not want to have to have an unnecessary surgery for myself, why would I want to make my sons go through an unnecessary surgery, even if they won't remember? I still have nightmares about my cesarean and what happened afterward. I know it is different for a baby, or people say it is, but what if it isn't? What if they truly remember, just don't know how to announce that they do?

I don't want to get into the reasons for a circumcision. There are tons for and against. For me, it's not about better sex, or cleanliness, or an open sore on my baby. It's about putting my son through something that in my mind is as unnecessary as my cesarean was. I know they aren't on the same playing field. I'm not a retard (even though I'm sure some people would think that or I'm completely crazy).

So, after watching this, I turned to look at my husband, and asked him "What would you think if I told you I don't want our sons circumcised?" He looked at me and said, "I have a penis. You don't. It's my decision." I looked at him and asked if he wanted to see some photos. He then laughed and said, "I know you research a lot. If you want to do something, I don't care either way."

I thought it would be tons harder than that!!

So, onto the second subject. A lot of the moms I follow cloth diaper. I have always had my doubts, even though my mom cloth diapered me. The one thing that got to me is how gross it is. But once you think about it, my job is pretty gross to some people. So gross shouldn't really phase me!

All the women I talk to that cloth diaper talk about how much cheaper it is. Cheaper is always nice haha. The other parts were that their babies got fewer rashes, potty trained faster and better, and they had less leaks out of their diapers. My daughter would leak out of so many diapers when she was little. I hated it. If I could just stop that with the next, I'm pretty sure I'm on board!

With this one, I turned to my husband again and asked him, "What would you say if I wanted to cloth diaper our next." He looked at me and said, "When did you become such a hippy?" I laughed at him, knowing it was true, and he just said, "As long as you do the laundry, I don't care."

So, we are going to try cloth diapering with our next too!!

It was definitely an interesting night. Two decisions that I have been debating for months suddenly came so easy. And now I keep thinking about how I couldn't possibly know it before now. It all seems so perfect.

******* Now I guess it is open to comments. Remember, I do NOT want any bashing. If you bash it, I will delete your comment. If you put your opinion in a nice way or if you comment without being a brute, your comment can stay. This is a personal decision for me and my family. This has no baring on your family, or people you know, or what you have done in the past. This is just about me! *******

Birth #36

This is a homebirth of a 3rd child. The one thing that amazed me about this birth is the stark contrast between this birth and how she remembers her first two births - particularly the fear that the hospital generated and how it took power away from the woman's body and wisdom.

I loved it, and hope you do too!!

The Home Birth of Cameron

H1N1, The Deadliest Virus Ever!!

Ok, so that is an exaggeration... Maybe.

I don't think there is anything to worry about with this pandemic. Less people have died from this strain of the flu than any other. The only problem is it attacks healthy people, whereas the regular flu attacks those who are sickish.

The fear around it has made it worse than it is, pushing out vaccines before they are ready, and causing general hysteria in the population.

Nowhere is worse than with pregnant women though.

In Utah, all hospitals have established a new policy that will last until the end of the flu season in March. For this post, I will only deal with how it handles the Labor and Delivery wing.

On the Valley View Medical Center website (the hospital in my town), they state:

Because of our strong commitment to patient safety and a high level of commitment to the health of our patients, Intermountain hospitals have implemented new guidelines that restrict patient visitation. Data suggests that the action will reduce the risk of spreading H1N1 and seasonal flu to those at high risk of serious complications. These visitation guidelines consist of the following:

• No visitors under the age of 14 are allowed in patient care areas.
• No more than two visitors at a time. This applies to both visitors in inpatient rooms and those accompanying patients to the emergency department. This will not apply to patients in end-of-life situations; please check with nursing staff.
• No sick visitors. If you have fever, cough, sore throat, fatigue, nausea, vomiting or diarrhea, please stay home.

Now, I understand the sick visitor thing. They are in labor or just had a baby, so if you're sick, stay away!!

Everything else is completely bogus. If you have other children, they cannot come see you until you come home. If you have a cesarean, that's 3 days without your other child or children and they can't meet the newest member of the family.

I'm glad they didn't stick with the one visitor only policy, because if I had to labor in the hospital and have to choose between my husband and my doula, I'm pretty sure my hubby would stay outside...

In the L&D wing, you can have visitors at any hour, but you can still only have 2 people in at a time. Which, in my opinion, really sucks.

So, with all these new safety measures, what would you do?

For me, I would have my baby at home!! You can have as many people as you want with you, your other children can see your baby, and you actually have a much smaller chance of getting sick at home since you already have the germs that are in your house. Not so in the hospital.

*Yes, that was a shameless plug, but I still think it's true!!*

Placentas Aren't Just For Babies - Part 1

In basically every country but ours, the placenta is believed to have a lot of amazing things for the postpartum woman. In China and Vietnam, the placenta is prepared for consumption by the mother to help recover from childbirth. In Italy, they use part of the placenta to help with lactation. In Hungary, they bite the placenta to expedite the completion of labor and also dry and grind it up then place it in their husband's drinks to to make them shoot blanks. In the Czech Republic and some parts of Morocco, new mothers believe the eating the placenta guarantees future fertility. And most midwives in the US have mothers take bites of raw placenta to help stop hemorrhaging because of the high oxytocin content.

There hasn't been much research on the placenta in the United States because it is believed to be a bio-hazard since it contains so much blood that *could* be infected. For this reason, no one is for sure what exactly is contained in a placenta. People hazard guesses, but no one is completely sure what nutrients and vitamins are contained in this vital organ.

With the laid back studies and other things they have done all around the world, they have found the placenta actually helps the uterus shrink back to its normal size faster, helps increase milk production, and helps prevent Postpartum Depression.

The one thing they do know is it contains the hormone CRH (Corticotropin-Releasing Hormone). This hormone is a stress reducer and is normally produced in the hypothalamus. In the last trimester, the placenta produces so much CRH that the amount in the blood stream triples, so the hypothalamus stops producing it. Postpartum women have lower than average levels of CRH which triggers depressive symptoms right after birth. Since the hypothalamus stopped producing the hormone, it takes a few days for it to realize the levels have dropped and needs to start working again. This has been known to be the three or four days of baby blues all women experience after the birth.

In 1954, a study of 210 women with insufficient milk supply were given dried and powdered placenta pills. 86% had a positive increase in their milk production within a matter of days. It was also found to enhance pain tolerance by increasing opium-like substances that are activated during childbirth.

About 10% of women experience an extreme drop in progesterone and estrogen after the birth of their baby and experience Postpartum Depression (PPD). This happens after day 10 when the baby blues are supposed to subside and things get back to normal. The symptoms of PPD are anxiety, sadness, mood swings, irritability, trouble concentrating, and trouble sleeping.

If PPD goes unnoticed and untreated, it can turn into Postpartum Psychosis. Although only about 2% of the women with PPD get Psychosis, it is still a terrible thing. I'm sure people have heard on the news about the women that have PPD and kill their children. This is NOT PPD. This is psychosis and it is a very real thing and demands treatment before it gets this far.

The FDA has denied the effects of the placenta without clinical trials, but the FDA also doesn't agree with many homeopathic substances that have been known to help all sorts of people.

Of all the stories I read while researching this, there are definitely two sides. One side that refuses to even think about eating their placenta, and the other side that is willing to try because it is cheaper and better than the anti-depressant drugs they can give you.

When I first heard about this from my SIL, I knew I would never want to try it. But, those are my famous last words. Even though research hasn't been completed on it or barely conducted, I am most willing to try this. I figure it can't hurt anything, and with the PPD I had with my daughter, anything is better than living in a tunnel for months.

Now, there are a lot of different ways the placenta can be used. You can steam it, cook it, then grind it into powder and put it into capsules. You can cut it up and place the bits into smoothies. You can powder it and place it on pizza or in your lasagna. You can bury it under a tree to remember your baby. You can even design it like a teddy bear!!

No matter how you want to use your placenta, you aren't the first person that has thought of it. And of the women that try it, every single woman that I found that has ingested the placenta after birth has been feeling better and more like themselves within hours of the first serving.

So, what do you have to lose?!

Placenta shakes

Placenta Sandwich

Placenta Teddy

Pregnancy vs Infertility

On my old post - Infertility Etiquette - there have been some interesting comments lately. The majority of comments are absolutely amazing, but there recently has been an anonymous commenter that has sparked a lot of thought for me and another one of the commenters.

"I am sure it is hard for someone who is struggling with infertility, however the "message for pregnant women" bothers me. A pregnant woman shouldn't have to feel guilty about being able to have a baby. If I'm pregnant, I can mention why I'm uncomfortable without feeling bad about it because I can have a baby and someone else cannot. I understand being sympathetic to someone who is infertile, but I also don't think it should be the elephant in the room and the pregnant woman has to pretend she isn't so she doesn't offend someone.

This is like a married person not talking about anything relating to marriage with a non-married person. Being married, and having babies, is part of the circle of life. If I was having a baby, I would want to rejoice in it and not have to walk on eggshells about it."

The one part about this comment is it doesn't really talk about what the post was about. They aren't talking about you rejoicing in your pregnancy or walking on eggshells. The post is talking about how pregnant woman complain about how they wish it was over, or other things like that when they aren't close to the end. It is as if they are taking their blessing for granted.

They aren't saying you can't complain. The aches and pains of pregnancy, plus the hormones running through your system make your uncomfortable and pregnancy, especially near the end, is a very uncomfortable thing and you cannot wait to meet your baby. I have been there! I was excited about the procedures they were going to do and almost hoped that I would be put into labor or need a cesarean so I could meet the baby I had been carrying for almost 9 months.

In a growing world of Political Correctness, infertility has been passed up. Pregnancy is something people take for granted 99% of the time, and it is those times that make the infertile couples ache. After so long, pregnancy becomes this amazingly perfect place that an infertile couple cannot know, and therefore a beautiful myth that other women complain about. It tarnishes the dream little by little.

I understand pregnant women need to vent. Everyone needs to vent sometimes. But, if you know one of your friends is having trouble conceiving or has had one or more losses, don't talk to them about it. Their journey is hard enough without their pregnant friends complaining about how awful pregnancy is.

So, anonymous commenter (I don't like them, if you want to say something rude, at least have the decency to sign in or leave your name and not be a coward), read the posts better, and don't get offended by what you think it meant. You are almost as bad as the infertile couples that complain about people that are TTC for under a year and don't know how hard their struggle is.

We all need to learn to be more patient and loving with our friends and relationships... Why not start by not complaining about one of life's great joys?